Hello, it’s Siri. Welcome to my weekly newsletter on managing your energy, time and head space for work that matters to you. I am an ICF Certified Coach, with more than 450 hours of client coaching. My coaching sessions are “advice-free zones” unless the client specifically asks for advice. So I offer my best insights, reflections, advice here, in this newsletter which is published every Sunday.
In this edition, we’ll continue exploring GRACE, a reflective framework for work and life and our focus is on Alignment.
“When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier.”
Roy E. Disney
Standing True to Your Values
When I was in my 20s, I was full of idealism. My values were crystal clear to me. I knew what was not acceptable to me and where to draw the line. I was willing to face the consequences of saying no, even when my circumstances were precarious.
I vividly remember my first team lead role in my early 20s. My manager asked me to falsify timesheets based on which we billed our clients. He wanted me to inflate the hours to overcharge them.
At that time, I had just walked away from my marriage, clueless about what to do next, with no money in my bank account. I badly needed the job which I got after months of anxious nail biting and desperate prayers. The economy wasn’t doing well, and finding similar opportunities seemed impossible. I could not afford to lose this job.
But when my manager asked me to fudge the timesheets, I felt a surge of anger. I refused.
“You either do it,” he said, “or I will find someone else who will.”
I threw my notebook on the table, watching it skid to a halt in front of him.
“I quit. I won’t fudge the timesheets for you. Do it yourself.”
“This is what happens when you hire a woman who has broken her own marriage”, he said spitefully.
And I walked out.
In hindsight, that decision was equal parts brave and reckless. I needed that job, but I didn’t think twice about the consequences of standing up for my values.
The Shades of Grey
As I grew older and gained more experience, I started to see the shades of grey in the world. On one hand, it made me slower to judge, and more understanding of nuances in situations and people. But it also led me to stretch the boundaries of what aligned with my values.
Inflating data by 5-10% on proposed outcomes? I told myself it was just a minor adjustment – nothing unethical. Slowly, I began compartmentalising my actions at work, separating them from my core values.
This led to inner conflict. I rationalised my actions with thoughts like:
- This is just how the world works.
- There’s no place for idealism in the real world.
- Everyone does it. If not me, someone else will do it.
- This does not harm anyone, so what’s wrong in doing it.
But the more my actions diverged from my values, the louder the inner conflict became. Eventually, it was impossible to ignore.
I confided in my mastermind group – an accountability circle with two peers. “My soul is being sucked away by this job,” I told them. “I need to leave.”
The Power of Alignment
Work that aligns with our values, purpose, and long-term goals is enriching and transformative. It makes a world of difference to how we show up at work every single day. We are able to show up more authentically and do our best work. Conversely, when our work doesn’t align with our values, purposes or long-term goals, it leaves us disconnected from ourselves, others and our relationships.
As we continue reflecting through the GRACE (Growth, Relationships, Alignment, Contribution, Energy) framework, this week’s focus is on Alignment. Use the prompts below to guide your journaling or introspection.
Reflective Focus Areas:
- Values
- Purpose
- Long Term Goals
1. Values
- How well did I uphold my core values in my work this year?
- Were there moments when my work conflicted with my values? How did I navigate those situations?
- What decisions or actions at work felt most aligned with my values?
- How did living by my values shape my relationships with colleagues or clients?
- What adjustments can I make to ensure my work aligns more fully with my values in the coming year?
2. Purpose
- What activities or moments this year gave me the greatest sense of meaning and fulfilment?
- How does my current path align with my deeper sense of purpose?
- Were there times when I felt disconnected from my purpose? What contributed to this, and how can I address it?
- What contributions did I make this year that I am most proud of?
- How can I reconnect with or deepen my sense of purpose in the coming year?
3. Long-Term Goals
- What progress did I make this year toward my long-term professional goals?
- Were my daily or weekly actions at work aligned with the future I want to create? Why or why not?
- Did I encounter any roadblocks that made me rethink or adjust my long-term goals?
- What resources, skills, or support do I need to continue advancing toward my goals?
- How can I bring more focus and clarity to my long-term aspirations in the coming year?
If I were to encapsulate the theme of my alignment this year in one word, it would be _________.
If I were to set an intention for my alignment in the coming year, it would be ____________.
Your Turn
Take some time to reflect. Choose the questions that resonate with you most, and journal your thoughts. Next week we will look at Contribution.
