Women Leadership Coaching
How to Stand Out Amongst All the Other Leaders – Especially Amidst Intense Competition
When I got promoted to my first management position, a peer remarked, “You got that promotion only because of diversity.”
I was livid.
I had worked my ass off for 2 years, delivering far more than he had. There were numbers, feedback and appreciation, not to mention that I had the promotion conversation a year back with my manager, and she gave me gaps I had to bridge in order to be considered for promotion.
I worked hard on all my projects, went on numerous soft skills training, reflected and worked with myself. I showed my manager a tangible shift in my soft skills, on top of my hard skills, and once she was convinced I was already operating at that managerial level, she initiated the case for promotion.
When I got promoted to my first management position, a peer remarked, “You got that promotion only because of diversity.”
I was livid.
I had worked my ass off for 2 years, delivering far more than he had. There were numbers, feedback and appreciation, not to mention that I had the promotion conversation a year back with my manager, and she gave me gaps I had to bridge in order to be considered for promotion.
I worked hard on all my projects, went on numerous soft skills training, reflected and worked with myself. I showed my manager a tangible shift in my soft skills, on top of my hard skills, and once she was convinced I was already operating at that managerial level, she initiated the case for promotion.
Despite that, she had to overcome opposition from my line manager back in India, who refused to take my promotion further, as I had escalated against him a year back for making a sexist remark in front of the whole team.
It was a long haul, before the promotion came through. I was exhausted from over performing at the next level for more than a year, without a guarantee of a promotion. Then, when the promotion was finally announced, my peer remarked, “You got that promotion only because of diversity.”
It made me wonder, “Has any man ever thought they got promoted because so far diversity had been in their favour?”
Talk about sour grapes.
The Case for Women Leadership Coaching
In the vast landscape of corporate jungles, women are often seen as raw diamonds – valuable, naturally brilliant and able, but their light doesn’t shine bright because they lack “confidence”. So all they need is a bit of polishing on their own, take things in their stride, develop a thick skin and storm on ahead through all the additional problems leaders have when they are not men.
I disagree with the “polishing bit”. I think we are perfect the way we are.
Unfortunately, the effects of being penalised as a woman in the workplace in our upbringing puts more pressure on women leaders. These are the additional luggage we carry in our lives, which puts more strain on us and causes us to break at some point. This breakdown often coincides with perimenopause, when overwhelm pervades all sections of our lives.
Two factors that need a closer look and exploration as a woman leader are
How do you make a mark as a leader?
How to tackle the unique challenges that you face as a woman leader?
How do you make a mark as a leader?
One of the metaphors for a leader is a lighthouse. In your role as a leader, challenges arise in the form of storms or tsunamis which can create confusion and uncertainty amongst your team.
Sometimes the challenges are more chronic like a persistent grey sky with a steady drizzle and the absence of sunlight for an extended period of time. This can suck the life and motivation out of your team.
You can spend your day (and night!) fighting the storms, and that sets you up to operate only from a fire-fighting mode. There is no time to sit back and reflect on how you want to make your mark as a leader.
Even when there is a lull in the storm, there are always hosts of committees, projects and initiatives along with people management issues to take care of.
As a leader, you need to be anchored firmly in your shore, so that even when the sea is turbulent, you are able to make decisions grounded in values and purpose. You are able to stand out not just for your strong presence, but also your unwavering ability to guide your team through the chaos.
To do this, the lighthouse does not compete or fight with the storm. It stands resolute, casting the beam of light that cuts through the confusion and darkness.
To be the lighthouse as a leader, you need to be able to put your roots deep into the ground. You can’t do that in the middle of the storm, on your own.
This is the space and the lull that coaching can offer you.
How do you make a mark as a leader?
One of the metaphors for a leader is a lighthouse. In your role as a leader, challenges arise in the form of storms or tsunamis which can create confusion and uncertainty amongst your team.
Sometimes the challenges are more chronic like a persistent grey sky with a steady drizzle and the absence of sunlight for an extended period of time. This can suck the life and motivation out of your team.
You can spend your day (and night!) fighting the storms, and that sets you up to operate only from a fire-fighting mode. There is no time to sit back and reflect on how you want to make your mark as a leader.
Even when there is a lull in the storm, there are always hosts of committees, projects and initiatives along with people management issues to take care of.
As a leader, you need to be anchored firmly in your shore, so that even when the sea is turbulent, you are able to make decisions grounded in values and purpose. You are able to stand out not just for your strong presence, but also your unwavering ability to guide your team through the chaos.
To do this, the lighthouse does not compete or fight with the storm. It stands resolute, casting the beam of light that cuts through the confusion and darkness.
To be the lighthouse as a leader, you need to be able to put your roots deep into the ground. You can’t do that in the middle of the storm, on your own.
This is the space and the lull that coaching can offer you.
In Women Leadership Coaching we will explore over the course of 6 In-Depth Leadership Coaching Sessions
- What are my values and how can I be anchored in them when there is chaos and confusion around me?
- How do I make decisions and how can I be at peace when I make decisions where it is not clear which option would be beneficial for me and my team?
- Where do I want to arrive in my leadership journey? What is the vision I have for myself and my team?
- How do I facilitate the process of learning when I can’t make time to learn?
- What systems do I need in place in order to manage my time and energy without feeling constantly overwhelmed?
- How do I relate to others in the work environment – my peers, my bosses and my team?
- How do I refine my style of leadership so that it is authentic to myself and is effective with my team?
These are the starting point of exploration in each area of leadership so that we understand and anchor these for you as your roots, that lets you stand your ground during a storm. This will help you be the beacon of light that cuts through the storm, darkness and chaos.
How to tackle the unique challenges that you face as a woman leader?
While the In-Depth Leadership Coaching Sessions give you the space to step back and reflect on the foundational aspects of your leadership style, you will still have day-to-day problems that need to be addressed.
The Sounding Board Sessions are designed to offer the space to sound out the unique challenges that you face as a woman leader.
How to Deal With the Double Bind Dilemma?
As a Woman Leader, you will be familiar with “double bind” if you have been criticised for being too assertive (often labelled as aggressive) or too soft (often seen as ineffective). This creates a narrow band of acceptable behaviour, making it difficult for women leaders to lead authentically.
How to Deal With Microaggressions and Subtle Discrimination?
Women Leaders frequently encounter subtle discrimination and microaggressions at the workplace, some of them intended and others not intended. These include being interrupted in meetings, having their ideas overlooked or being subjected to inappropriate comments.
How to watch out for the Glass Cliff Phenomenon?
Women Leaders are often placed in leadership roles, during times of crisis. In times, when you either swim or sink, the risk of failure is very high. This is a phenomenon known as the “glass cliff”. This sets up women for failure, or at the very least overwhelm, stress and burnout.
How to draw boundaries between personal and professional responsibilities?
Women Leaders often struggle with guilt, overwhelm and exhaustion because of expectations and oversized responsibilities in both professional and personal life. This can lead to burnout and the constant sense of guilt or missing out on one or both aspects of their lives.
These are some of the themes, and the Sounding Board Sessions can be used to explore situations that are on the top of your mind, and explore how to work with the challenges and ensure you have sanity in both your personal and professional life.
Difference between Shirisha as a Coach —and any other Leadership Coach
The only way you can experience the difference between Shirisha’s Coaching —and any other coach on the planet— is to experience it. There are three reasons and a P.S.:
1. Every single session is tailored and 1:1.
The Coaching Sessions are not templated. We have a broad theme for every session, so that we have boundaries of exploration. What happens in the coaching session is very organic, and we work with whatever comes up for you in that session. I don’t follow a set format, model, or framework. As an eclectic and intuitive coach, I tailor each session to meet the client’s needs in the moment using whatever tools or frameworks or activities that are needed.
2. Each session is client-led.
As a Woman Leader, and my client my aspiration is for you to trust yourself, and fully come into your own power. I will set the boundaries of the session, hold the space, ask questions, challenge you, process your challenging experiences, celebrate your wins, but the session is led by you. You set the agenda you would like to explore, and we will go with whatever is important to you. You decide what you want out of each session right at the outset, and we will work together to help you achieve it.
3. No long-term contracts.
My goal as a coach is to work myself out of the job. The longest contract I offer for executive coaching is a 6 month contract, unlike the typical 12 month contract.. I believe in rapid, transformational shifts that help clients achieve their goals quickly and move forward with their lives. No lengthy contracts or repetitive sessions rehashing the same problem.
4. No pushing hard.
As a coach, I focus on helping clients uncover their intrinsic motivation and desires to achieve their goals. I don’t rely on raw willpower, surface level extrinsic motivation or forceful techniques. Instead, I guide clients to tap into their latent power, enabling them to move forward naturally.
P.S. I invest time in our coaching sessions even before they begin. I engage in a 30-minute meditation routine to prepare, ensuring I bring my full presence and attention. This helps create a safe space for clients to fully engage in the session.
Testimonials
I feel seen, heard, and accepted for who I am. A lot of times, this is what I need more than motivation, goals, or strategies. She helps bring full awareness to what is going on. Some things have needed practical solutions and she has left me with suggestions to consider. But sometimes, I have needed a radical realignment in reframing persistent beliefs about work, colleagues, and my own self-worth.
Why coaching?
I used to ask the question, “How to find purpose, joy, and meaning in work?” And I was consuming content (books, articles, podcasts, videos) to find the answer. But it got tricky when I started asking the question, “How do I find purpose, joy, and meaning in my work?” The answer to this second question turns out to be a journey of curiosity, reflection, and trusting myself. It involves staying with feelings, reframing some persistent beliefs, and a ton of frustrating trial and error. And these were not easy to do on my own. In my experience, this journey became more fun when I allowed the support of a wise guide, aka a coach. To have a comfortable, meaningful relationship with what I do—what I spend most of my day on, from what I derive some aspects of my self-worth and identity and all of my income—I needed guidance that isn’t necessarily therapy or career-specific mentoring. For me, coaching met this need.
Why I recommend Siri?
I started my sessions with Siri in mid 2021 and continue to benefit from her guidance. I found Siri’s approach very different from what I saw in my previous coaching experiences. One thing her coaching style isn’t is a templatized program about climbing up proverbial ladders, setting goals, or making lists. These never worked sustainably for me anyway. She has no program, no one-size-fits-all philosophy. Each of my sessions with Siri have taken a different form. And she brings all her skills and presence to address whatever I am needing to address—no trend-based productivity mumbo jumbo, just staying with what comes up and works best for me.
Siri is an acute and perceptive listener and holds space with empathy and kindness. I feel seen, heard, and accepted for who I am. A lot of times, this is what I need more than motivation, goals, or strategies. She helps bring full awareness to what is going on. Some things have needed practical solutions and she has left me with suggestions to consider. But sometimes, I have needed a radical realignment in reframing persistent beliefs about work, colleagues, and my own self-worth.
I found it freeing to not be given fixed solutions to implement. Our sessions are always flexible too. I have the agency to decide when and how often I need the sessions and we talk about scheduling based on our availability. I found this very empowering.
A fun thing about Siri is that she has a wide range of practices, interests, and curiosities beyond her obvious in-depth experience in coaching—nonviolent communication, tai chi, shinrin-yoku, and several rigorous forms of meditation. And conversations with her are enriched by all these interests (though you wouldn’t even know she’s into these things if you didn’t ask). Over the years, I’ve also drawn inspiration from her own growth story, from how she walks the talk in her context.
In the last 2.5 years, I have been able to navigate some toxic workplace conflicts, plan my finances with courage, and clarify my own vision of what well-being at work looks like for me. I’m grateful to Siri for being the catalyst in this change.
Important: Reason Why You Shouldn’t Delay
#1. It is more economical than most coaches.
Most Executive Coaches charge between ₹15,000 to ₹25,000 and require lengthy contracts of 6-12 sessions. Here you pay ₹15,000 for 3 sessions altogether.
Additionally, many coaches come from HR backgrounds without leadership experience. I bring real-life corporate leadership experience, having worked my way up to Vice President in consulting and hard-core delivery roles in high pressure environments.. In our sessions, you’ll benefit from my practical experience as well as my diverse interests and practices.
#2. You are in a “safe space”
I work hard to create a safe space for my clients through my own inner work, studying with other professionals and teachers, and reflecting on my approach with my mentor. Creating this safe space is where I dedicate all my personal and professional development time because without it, no learning or change can happen.
Most coaches provide this space by just listening. However, true safe space goes beyond listening. It involves bringing full presence and awareness, being completely with the client, and removing oneself from the equation. I have no agenda for you; my goal is simply to help you discover yourself.
Most coaches provide this space by just listening. However, true safe space goes beyond listening. It involves bringing full presence and awareness, being completely with the client, and removing oneself from the equation. I have no agenda for you; my goal is simply to help you discover yourself.
#3. No hidden costs or upsells
There are no hidden costs in my coaching contract. Unlike many coaches who upsell additional services or programs as “must-haves,” I do not pitch extra courses or products during our sessions. My coaching sessions stand alone, independent of any other services or offerings.
#4. Offers you a competitive advantage amongst your peers
This program opens twice a year, and I work 1:1 with 6 leaders at a time. The program opens in January 2025 and April 2025 for enrollment. Investing 3 hours in a month to work with an experienced coach gives you the competitive advantage that will help you make your mark as a leader.
How do I sign up for Women Leadership Coaching Sessions?
Eligibility: To sign up, you need to have completed a 30-minute Discovery Call or a coaching session with me and fill up the below application form.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is this Coaching Program right for me?
Way too many people think they have to figure out stuff on their own. As a woman, you are likely responsible for just more than your work, and team. This is a way of giving yourself space and dedicated time, with an experienced coach holding the space for you, to help you reflect, integrate and act according to your values.
Having a coach is a competitive advantage, especially in a crowded corporate jungle. The value of someone who has your back, and has no agenda except your well being is priceless. If you would like someone to have your back, hold space for you, as you figure things out, this is right for you.
This is NOT for you, if you expect a templated program that will magically make you a great leader. I won’t be offering solutions or a framework to transform you. I will hold space, support you in figuring out answers to tough questions, reflect and help you integrate what you have learned in your journey. I won’t be giving you an easy time, you can be sure of that. But I will do so in a respectful and compassionate way, being mindful of boundaries.
Can I expense these coaching sessions?
Yes. Most organisations set aside a budget for a Leader’s learning and development needs. Coaching falls under this category, and many organisations hire coaches to work with their leaders. You should be able to expense this under the budget allotted for your development.
I am not sure how well we would work together. How can I find out?
You can sign up for a 30 minute “Free, No Obligation” Discovery Call for us to figure out if we would work well together. You can also sign up for a single coaching session or Intensive Insight Sessions, which are of 3 session duration. I ask you to trust your own experience. I do have testimonials on the website, but trust your own experience over everything else.
What is the validity of the coaching contract?
The 3 session coaching contract is valid for 45 days from the date of the first session or the start of the agreement date, whichever is earlier.
How can I extend the coaching contract?
By mutual consent between the coach and the client, the contract can be extended for another 3 sessions through email or verbal consent.
What is the format of the coaching session?
The coaching sessions are conducted via Zoom. If the client is based out of Bangalore, then the sessions can be conducted in person. The sessions are live, and NOT RECORDED.
Is this a Group Coaching Program or 1:1?
This is an individual coaching program, so the sessions will be 1:1 and scheduled at a mutually agreed time between the coach and the client.
Have more questions? Contact me.
the imposter syndrome report
Sign up for the Being Sane Newsletter and access The Imposter Syndrome report. You can find out The Reason Why Imposter Syndrome Occurs (And How To Manage It). Every Sunday, you will receive an article on tough conversations, workplace issues and more that will give you insights, tools and resources to have more sanity in your working and personal lives.
Click here to subscribe and get it right away.
Address
RBI Layout, JP Nagar 7th Phase, Bangalore (Bengaluru) 560 078, India
